March 20, 2008

How many cannibals could your body feed?
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You Can Still Fart in America

February 7, 2008

farting-preacher.jpgAlas, the rumors aren’t true.

It was reported that Camden-Rockport Middle School had banned intentional flatulence, which is properly defined as “flatus expelled through the anus” and that intentional farting could result in detention. However, Principal Maria Libby says that there is no new school policy on blowing ass, although she admits that “farting can still be considered a disruption.”

Says student Jordan Taylor: “They [eighth-grade students] would do it [heiney honk] in science class and other places. It’s a natural occurrence, and we all do it 16 times a day.” Hey, maybe you only do it 16 times a day, my little eighth-grade leprechaun, but a real man does it 16 times an hour.

One student expressed mixed feelings as to whether or not the public fart show was appropriate. Mixed feelings? If delivering a butt burp were ever appropriate, it wouldn’t be funny.

“Remy LeVine said he was in the class when CRMS science teacher Brad LaRoche talked to all the eighth-grade boys about the issue, as well as the consequences.”

Oh, I’ll bet that meeting was a hoot . . . or was it a toot?

Editor’s Day Off

January 13, 2007

The headline and the photo do not belong together . . . I hope.

I Want Out of this Box

December 1, 2006

I’m going to get out of this box soon. No, not Britney Spears’.

So, do they actually need an office?

October 19, 2006

I’m guessing that once you’ve read the sign, you have all the advice you need.

Get Your Tickets Here

September 9, 2006

Here’s some more silliness for us all to try. Make your own concert ticket.

Cannibals Soup

September 7, 2006

Did anyone else have these trading cards as a kid? They were a take-off on popular products of the day. Boy, I had forgotten all about these. Funny.