In my local paper, I spotted an ad for an ADHD study conducted by a local research consortium. And just what, exactly, might indicate ADHD in your 6-12 year old?
- Has difficulty paying attention at home or in school.
- I say, who doesn’t? I had teachers who could make sex ed boring.
- Can’t sit still and is easily distracted, can’t play quietly.
- I say, kids who play quietly belong in horror films.
- Does not seem to listen, loses things, interrupts others.
- I say, this describes most women, not children (just kidding, ladies).
- Has trouble taking turns, cannot stay seated, fidgety.
- I say, this sounds like the complaining of a Dickens villain.
I would be worried if my children didn’t show such symptoms, which are nothing more than symptoms of childhood. Indeed, if your child showed the exact opposite of the above “symptoms,” they’d call your child in for an autism study. You can’t win.
I quote no less an expert than George Carlin: “You wanna help your kids? Leave them the f*ck alone!!!“